FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS
Some boys immediately admit the illegal sexual behavior when questioned by their parents or the parents of the victim. Others admit much later, after they enter treatment. Some boys say they did not do anything, and they stick to that story for months. These boys often refuse to admit the truth because they are afraid of the consequences. Such boys report that the longer they don’t tell the truth, the harder it is to tell the truth later.
Your son and your family will be supported in being prepared for home visits. Visits are arranged with parents and coordinated through your son’s therapist. Parents are also allowed to visit their son while in Utah. We will make recommendations for lodging accommodations for those visits. None of those visits are on our campus. We always request parents coordinate these visits with their son’s therapist to make sure they occur at times that are therapeutically optimal and do not interfere with the treatment plan.
We take every effort to ensure strict confidentiality of students and families we work with. Your information will never be released unless you have given written consent to do so. Likewise, your child’s therapist may not inform you about information that comes out during therapy. Unless this information is life threatening to the student or others the therapist will most likely encourage the student to share information with parents and will not disclose the information themselves. This allows the therapist and student to continue their trusting relationship upon which therapeutic change takes place.
There are several good indicators when considering Kaizen Academy for your son. They are are behaviors, patterns, and risk. What specific behaviors are you concerned about and also what is your son engaging in that brought up these concerns? How often or under what circumstances do these behaviors occur and how long have you been aware of what is taking place?
Also, what risk is your son willing to take to continue his behaviors? What risks are you aware of at this time? It is important to recognize that generally speaking, behaviors you may know about are usually just a small part of what has and is actually taking place. There are typically many more occurrences parents know nothing about that have been going on for sometime.
You need to also keep in mind that some sexual behaviors are common and “normal” among adolescents. You may always speak with you sons pediatrician to confirm.
Kaizen Academy is not a boot camp in any form. We are a specialized residential treatment program designed to help students effectively deal with sexual behavioral problems. It is not shame based or confrontational.
It is a relationship based and strength-based program.
Few stages are as important for the proper development of a child as the sexual stages. It is our job as parents to be in tune with these amorphous emotions and nascent desires. The best thing parents can do to help ensure the proper development of their children is to remain attentive and informed.
There’s a spectrum of sexual development in children. In the middle of the spectrum lies the standard deviation: some children’s sexuality develops more rapidly, while others’ more slowly. Likewise, there are certain patterns of behavior that fall within that normal deviation. For instance, children and adolescents oftentimes play “doctor.”As long as they are of comparable age and development, each displaying the same curiosities and insecurities, such exploration is acceptable, even desirable. The vast majority of children, from a young age, derive enjoyment from genital manipulation.
While you can hardly call such activity “masturbation,” parents need not be alarmed when a child’s nebulous enjoyment begins to assume the more concrete form of sexual pleasure.
As long as children are nurtured through this time and taught to cherish their sexuality without exposing or flaunting it indiscriminately, it can be a healthy experience for the child. Outside of this normal behavior, however, there are certain red flags for which parents need to be on the lookout.
Sexually problematic behavior in children and adolescents is a telltale sign of improper or unbalanced development, which has the potential to grow into much bigger sexual problems as well as aggression, bullying, and violent tendencies. Here are some classic red flags:
Children below the age of 13 should never be exposed to pornography. Deviant, hardcore, or fetishistic websites are INAPPROPRIATE. As with the developmental spectrum, there are forms of pornography that simply lie outside of healthy maturation and normal fantasy constructs.
• Inappropriate or unwanted sexual contact with other children
While some physical exploration should be expected, it need always be with the caveat that the contact occurs between consensual peers.
Granted, consensus can be difficult to define or establish at younger ages, however, sexual bullying, or even harassment and assault, are never okay.
Children must be taught to respect the physical boundaries of others–only then can they be expected to internalize their own physical boundaries.
• Repetitive public exposure
An occasionally naked 5-year-old is one thing; a perpetually naked 10-year-old is another. Children need to be taught to respect their own privacy and to keep their bodies to and for themselves. When they make a mistake, help them to see why it was a mistake, and to understand how to avoid making the same kinds of mistakes in the future.
• Mastrubation in public places is also sexually problematic.
A small number of adolescents may be sexually attracted to children rather than to age-appropriate peers. They may be developing a mental disorder known as pedophilia.
Pedophilia involves intense sexual arousal to children 13 or younger. To be diagnosed, the person must be at least 16 years of age and at least five years older than the child they are attracted to. This is a rare condition in adolescents and only a qualified professional should make a diagnosis.
When you have dealt with any of these issues and, after repeatedly talking with your children and attempting to correct the behavior by getting local assistance, you find that they persist, you need to seek professional help. It is in both your and your child’s best interests to curb these patterns before they become exaggerated and solidify into long-term character deficiencies. Remember, seeing a professional isn’t an admission of parental guilt, nor a scarlet mark of inadequacy. It is a simple statement: I want what is best for my child, and I will do whatever I can to help them achieve lasting success.
Boys with good school performance and grades to boys with poor school performance and learning problems.
Boys with good social skills and friendships to boys with poor social skills and few or no friends.
Boys with no history of abuse, neglect, or serious family problems to boys with a history of abuse or neglect and highly problematic family situations.
Boys with no major behavior problems at home or school to boys with significant problems at home and in school.
Boys with positive peer group and school activities to boys with a delinquent peer group and low involvement in school activities.
Boys with no previous delinquent behavior to boys with an extensive history of aggressive or delinquent acts.
Sexual issues are generally symptomatic of other non-sexual problems which may include anxiety, depression, stress, poor social skills, and sexual identity confusion.
At Kaizen Academy, our highly specialized treatment environment allows and supports students to be able to fully disclose, some for the first time in years, the extent of their behaviors without fear of shocking their therapists or being ostracized by their peers. They can discuss their problems without judgment, guilt, secrecy or shame. This is not the case in other non-specific residential treatment programs, where students are often ostracized and frequently expelled once they disclose their sexual history. When a student does not feel safe he will not divulge the extent of his behaviors nor will he participate fully any therapeutic interventions.
Therapy begins the moment your child is enrolled.
Therapy at Kaizen Academy is a carefully planned treatment environment in which everyday events and interactions are therapeutically designed for the purpose of enhancing social skills and building confidence. Students also receive group therapy. Individual and family therapy is introduced as soon as your child completes their first week at Kaizen Academy.
Family therapy will begin when your child completes his first week at Kaizen Academy.
Your child’s therapist will contact you to discuss format, people involved and content of calls as it varies with each family dynamic. Your child and therapist will call you to discuss progress and work through issues as needed.
Family therapy may also happen in person as part of a visit when your child becomes eligible.
Your son’s therapist will give you their contact information during the first week your son is at Kaizen Academy.
Many of the families we work with have expressed frustration about previous treatment programs that have been unsuccessful in helping their son.
And it is concerning when your child has been asked to leave because of their behaviors and choices. Some programs help in certain areas, however, are unable or unwilling to work with his sexual issues. Kaizen Academy specializes in helping students with sexual behavioral problems.
We also help our students with non-sexual issues as well as: adoption / attachment challenges, anxiety disorders, alcohol and drug issues, anger issues, depression, self harm, social issues, and other diagnoses.
Kaizen Academy provides a positive environment where strong boundaries are maintained.
Our culture promotes accountability and safety. Students who are further along in their treatment and more advanced in their clinical work take a leading role in providing positive coaching and mentoring for newer students.
Kaizen Academy provides an honest and open door culture where students can discuss their issues without fear of judgment, rejection, or shame by their peers , staff or therapists.
Because of the positive environment, there is less likelihood of negative acting out. Students hold each other accountable for their behaviors and help each other stay focused on treatment progress.
Some do; many do not.
Some have learning disabilities or Attention-Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD).
Some have Oppositional Defiant Disorder (ODD) or Conduct Disorder (CD). Other psychological diagnoses, including depression or Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). These diagnoses would need to be considered in treatment planning and during the 60 Day Assessment.
The most important part of the 60 Day Evaluation is determining the appropriate course of treatment.
A conference will be held with the family and treatment team to determine next best recommended steps.
Currently there are very few programs which specialize in treating adolescent males with sexual behavioral problems. Many programs will say they address these issues. They do not provide the kind of treatment environment where a student feels completely non-judged and safe to discuss sexual issues.
When this specific environment is not in place, students simply will not engage. Kaizen Academy is one of a few programs across the country that has been developed specifically to address adolescent male sexual behavioral problems.
We have been in operation serving families since 1989.